I'm sorry that it hurts, sis! Breakups are painful, there's just no way around that. But after a good cry-it-out and a handful of chocolate chips, gather up your courage and follow this five-step plan:

1. The first important step: Take what he says at face value. Meaning, if he says he's not ready for a relationship, respect his decision.

2. More important: Hold your head up high. Take on each day with dignity and humility. Do not insult him, talk bad about him, try to convince him his decision is wrong, etc. Be you—the you that God adores—and treat him just like you should treat everyone else, with class and respect. No matter how he treats you.

3. Even more important: Take some time to put distance between you. Don't try to hang on, or hope things will change back. He may want to continue to "hang out" with you, which might be alright for him, but probably really hard for you. If you need space, ask him for it, and ask him to respect your request.

4. Still MORE important: Give it time. Time has an amazing way of making things not so bad. We just took our daughters on their first airplane ride. Ryan (our two-year-old little girl) was looking out the window at the cars on the freeway, and my husband said, "See how small they are? The farther you get, the smaller they seem." I think the same is true with painful situations. Time has a way of making each one seem small—but it takes time to get there!

5. MOST important: trust that Christ will see you through ALL situations, including this one. Philippians 4:4-7 (New Living Translation) says:

" ⁴ Always be full of joy in the Lord. I say it again—rejoice! ⁵ Let everyone see that you are considerate in all you do. Remember, the Lord is coming soon.

 ⁶ Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. ⁷ Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus.

 ⁸ And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. ⁹ Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you."

So fix your eyes on Christ (Colossians 3:2), give it time, get some space, and hold your head up high. You are an amazing creation of Christ, a child of God, worth far more to Him than the flowers—and look how beautiful they are. Imagine how beautiful you are to God!

Read Psalm 139 tonight before you go to bed.

Hope that helps, sis!

Love,