Ask Jessie / I have a friend who is gay. I’ve told him I don’t support his lifestyle, but he tends to ask why. He’s not a Christian, though, so telling him, “‘Cause the bible says so,” doesn’t go over well. I believe when God tells us not to do something, He always has a good reason. Like how the Jews couldn’t eat certain meats because if they cooked them wrong they could get some nasty diseases. So what was God’s reason when He said homosexuality is wrong? Why is being gay bad for someone?

You’re right: God “always has a reason” for the rules He gives us. But sometimes He doesn’t tell us what they are. For example, when God gave the Israelites the Levitical Law in the Old Testament, you’re correct that the dietary laws kept the people from unnecessary illness. But there were other laws He gave at the same time that didn’t make as much sense (to human minds). For example, I can’t think of a real practical reason why the men weren’t to shave the corners of their beards, or why Moses had to sprinkle holy items with blood to consecrate them (nothing hygienic about that!). The reason God gave for many of His laws was simply “Because I said so.” Okay, that’s a bit oversimplified. The actual reason He gave was, “Now you must become holy, because I am holy!” (Leviticus 11:45)

Here’s what I’m getting at: Although it’s nice when we can see a practical reason why God tells us to do (or not to do) something, those reasons aren’t always visible to us. We have to trust that as our Perfect Parent, God knows better than we do and is protecting us from something unseen (whether disease, destruction or even ourselves). As we mature in Christ, we learn to trust God with those things more and more, and we ask why less often.

Unfortunately, your friend doesn’t have the faith to trust that God knows best even when He doesn’t explicitly tell us why. I think it’s awesome that you want to show your friend that homosexuality is wrong, but truthfully, no amount of debate will be sufficient to convince him that his lifestyle is hurting him (even though there are some good points). Until he accepts God and believes in His Word, Satan will keep blinding him from the truth.

So here’s my advice: Rather than focus on reasons why your friend’s homosexual lifestyle is wrong, focus instead on His need for Jesus. Just like every other non-Christian, your friend’s sin is only a symptom of the greater problem: a heart in need of salvation. Be bold with your faith and pray that God will chose to open your friend’s eyes.

Love,
Jessie

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