Ask Jessie / How can I know God's plan for my life? I've always felt that God was leading me to go to medical school, but recently I've started seriously thinking about working with Doctors Without Borders. For some reason, it kind of feels like the thing I'm supposed to do. Could this be God speaking to me?

Don't we all sometimes wish we could just get a detailed life map that shows us exactly what God wants us to do? Maybe that's because we're afraid that left on our own we'll mess things up along the way, or maybe we're facing a tough choice and just want to know what is the "right" thing to do. As Christians—and especially in our teens and early 20s, when we're making so many huge decisions—we talk a lot about God's "plan," "leading" and "will." To tell you the truth, I think we overuse those phrases. Don't get me wrong, I absolutely believe that at times God directly "calls" someone to do something specific, either in a moment, or as a lifetime mission. (We read about many of those callings in the pages of Scripture.) But I also think that sometimes we try to spiritualize the choice we're drawn to in any given situation by saying that we feel God is "leading us" or "calling us" to a certain school, or to play a certain sport, or to go on a short-term missions trip.

About a year and a half ago I read a book I wish I had read a decade ago: Decision Making and the Will of God (by Garry Friesen). It's a thick book filled with a lot of heavy topics. If you're up for a long read, I highly recommend it. But just in case you need the Cliff notes version in modern English, that's what big sisters are for. :-)

In a nutshell, Mr. Friesen argues that instead of trying to figure out God's "personal will" for your life—in decisions like whom to marry, where to go to school, which car to buy and what career to chose—your time is much better spent figuring out what God's Word says on the subject, applying the wisdom God has given you, and then choosing whichever option you like best! And let me tell ya, this method of decision making brings so much freedom!

Let's look at each of those steps again:

1. Spend time really seeking out what the Bible has to say about the decision in front of you. If God's Word is clear on a subject (like not dating unbelievers, not working for someone who exploits the poor, etc.) then your decision is made for you. In the pages of the Bible, we also find verses that guide us to examine our motives in making a decision (like not putting any person, job, or accomplishment in the place God deserves in our life).

2. Do your homework. Research, pray, and ask people who are smarter or have a few grey hairs what they think!

3. If the Bible doesn't give a command or principle that directly speaks to your dilemma (in other words, you have a "nonmoral" decision to make), you're free to choose whichever option you want. Any decision you make that doesn't go against God's Word is okie-dokie with Him.

No matter what choice you make, be humble enough to trust the outcome to God. He gives us the freedom to make many decisions on our own, but He that doesn’t mean He’s going to leave us stranded to face the consequences (good or bad) alone!

The bottom line is that God wants to be intimately involved in the process of our decision making. He wants to use these tough decisions to draw us to our knees and closer to Him. I have a feeling that is more important to Him than which college we choose, or what job we pursue. Our whole lives should be about becoming more like Christ, no matter what our circumstances, right?

Now, let's apply this new decision-making technique to your situation, whether you should go to medical school or directly to Doctors Without Borders. I can't think of any Scriptures that address either one. They both sound like amazing opportunities. I would do some more homework, more praying, and more asking around. Think about your motivation behind each of those options, and ask God to reveal any areas of your heart that might be tainting your view. Then use that gorgeous head God has given you and make whichever decision you feel is wisest for this season of your life. Whatever you choose, allow God to grow you, stretch you and make you more like His Son along the journey!

Happy decision-making!

Other questions in this category

	I like a guy, but he's Methodist and I'm Baptist. We haven't really talked about religion much, except that we are both Christians. Do denomations make a difference? And what are the real differences between Methodists and Baptists?
	When I went to camp at Hume Lake, it was great and life- changing. I rededicated myself to God, but when I got home, I went back to the same old ways. I really want to be in God's image. Like when people look at me, I want them to see God. What can I do to change?
	What should you do when you do something you know is wrong, and you want to resolve it with God, but for some reason you don't even feel guilty about it? Because I know what I did was wrong, but I don't feel bad about it.
	I've never felt so worthless in my life. God has gifted me in many areas, and people acknowledge my gifts, but at the same time they create expectations for me that I feel I can't reach. When I fail to reach those expectations I feel worthless. I know I can find my value and worth in God, but sometimes I don't feel that I'm truly valuable to anyone else. How do I learn to meet expectations and feel valuable?
	I have really big fear of my mom dying. She is in good health and everything, I'm just afraid that one day I'll wake up and she won't be there anymore. Sometimes I can't sleep for hours because I'm so worried; I want to be awake in case something does happen. I know it's all in God's hands, but I still worry. How do I stop worrying so much?
	Lately I haven't been doing my devotions or spending time with God like I should be, and I can see it showing in my life. I know it's different for everyone, but what do you do or recommend doing for devotions?
	I have a really strong desire to be an actress and live in Hollywood. I want it so bad that it hurts to know how small the chances are, and that it may not be what God wants for me. I know it's not right, but I've been avoiding what God wants me to do because I am scared it may not be acting in movies. What should I do?
	I have a friend who is gay. I’ve told him I don’t support his lifestyle, but he tends to ask why. He’s not a Christian, though, so telling him, “‘Cause the bible says so,” doesn’t go over well. I believe when God tells us not to do something, He always has a good reason. Like how the Jews couldn’t eat certain meats because if they cooked them wrong they could get some nasty diseases. So what was God’s reason when He said homosexuality is wrong? Why is being gay bad for someone?
	When I was young (only five or six), I did something horrible. My parents had sent me to my room for something, and I don’t know why I was so angry, but I told God that He wasn't God, Satan was. Very soon after that I was really sorry and I begged God to forgive me and erase what I had said. I didn't mean what I said; I was just having a childish tantrum. But even now, I worry that I may not be forgiven, that I committed the unforgivable sin. It worries me so much I want to cry. I really hope God has forgiven me. I'm so scared that I might spend eternity in hell for what I did. Am I forgiven, or eternally damned?
	I recently heard a sermon about fake Christianity. The speaker said that a person can fool anyone—even themselves—into thinking they’re a Christian. Having been a Christian all my life, I don’t remember ever having that big life-changing moment. I remember the day I became a Christian, but I was four, so my life didn’t change a lot. How can I tell if I really am a Christian or if I’ve just fooled myself and everyone else into thinking I am?
	I was up at Hume last week and went to your “4 Big, Obnoxious Lies” seminar. I really loved your PowerPoint, but I didn’t get a chance to write down some of the verses. Could you post the verses online?
	My dad is Jewish and mom is Catholic. None of us go to church (or temple).My dad is against me being a Christian and going to church. I haven’t even told him that my life is dedicated to God. I have to hide my Bible and all my crosses from him. It makes me so angry knowing he won’t accept me for who I am. And on top of that, my few close friends here are not Christian. Mostly atheists. I just feel alone. Like in the book of Daniel—he was so true to God and had so much strength. But it's just so hard when no one around is encouraging or accepting my life for Jesus. Any suggestions to help me deal with this?
	My friend isn’t really an atheist; she believes in a god, but just not our God. I want to bring her to God, but how? What should I say? I have tried before, but she won’t listen. Please help!
	I’m having some trouble understanding what it says in Matthew 12:31-37, when Jesus talks about the “unforgivable sin.” I have a hard time understanding why God would choose to claim something as unforgivable. And I want to make sure that I haven’t committed it. I don’t understand this passage and it has worried me for years. I randomly get worried that I might have said something that is unforgivable. I have read a commentary passage on the passage, and listened to speakers who basically say that if you worry about committing an unforgiveable sin, it means that you’re forgivable because God has placed in you a desire to repent. I don’t get why worrying would mean you haven’t done this. I just need to know what this means. Thanks.
	I came to your “Busting the Boyfriend-less Blues” seminar at Hume Lake, but I didn’t have a pen. Could you put the verses you used on the website, especially that one you paraphrased at the end? Thanks!
	My boyfriend is a senior and he's not a Christian. I'm a freshman and I am a Christian. I know that sounds like the perfect recipe for disaster, but I know that he respects me and my boundaries and he is completely open to Christianity. My parents like him a lot and trust that he won't do anything to put me in any harm. We take him to church with us on most weekends. My boyfriend, although he is not a Christian, is "spiritual but not religious," meaning he believes in all the principles of being a Christian, but is not necessarily tied to one religion. I consider him more respectful and honest than most of the Christian guys that I grew up with. He doesn't take advantage of me, and if he wants to do something with me that he deems questionable, he always asks me first. Bottom line, if I am in a relationship with a guy who is not a Christian, but he is being drawn closer to God through me, is there anything wrong with that?
	I’ve gone to church my whole life. When I was around nine or ten, one night I prayed and asked Jesus to save me. The thing is, I was really shy (and still am), and so I didn't tell anyone. Since I hadn’t told anyone about my relationship with Christ, I wondered if it was real, so a week later I asked Him to come into my life again. That happened a couple more times, but I still never told anyone. Eventually, when I was twelve, my pastor asked me to meet with him, and I prayed with him. Now, I keep wondering when I was really saved. It was a process for me, not a particular moment, and I sort of feel like I need to know a real date. What do you think?
	I feel as if the harder I try to be better and live my life for God, the more things fall apart. I can’t really sleep, and when I do I have stressful dreams and I wake up with a sore jaw from grinding my teeth. I don’t know what to do. I'm praying more than ever, but I still feel alone.